Mikki Brisk

 

 

I was out and about yesterday when a commercial vehicle zoomed past so quickly I was barely able to read the signage on the back of the truck. But read it I did. The language appeared as follows: “Monkey’s and There Business Will Follow.”

 

I wish this was a joke, but it was right in front of me. It was printed, not hand-drawn. It was probably about 1.5 by 2.5 feet in area, not tiny. It was real, not an illusion.

 

I began to stammer out-loud, unable to find words. Finally my brain kicked in and cycled through these thoughts… Someone came up with the idea for this sign and said alright! That person then went to a shop and asked for this specific sign to be made. In all likelihood, a sales person took the order and said alright! That person then pushed the order through. In all likelihood, a fabricator received the order to manufacture said sign and said alright! That person then made the sign. I may be missing a set of eyes somewhere along the line. If not, then I’m guessing 3 human beings looked over this order and simply said alright! I mean, I haven’t heard of any heads exploding recently, from grammatical shock or anything. I can only imagine none of the folks involved noticed the plethora of spelling and grammar problems.

 

I can tell you that after seeing that sign it took me a good 5 minutes or so before my ability to speak returned. My brain was that addled, friends. I’m still stymied. And here’s what I want to know – when did it become acceptable to be so flippin’ stupid? I know a lot of people blame texting, but that can’t be it, can it? Don’t we still have to learn to spell? Don’t we still use words to communicate? Isn’t grammar still taught?

 

I know I’m no whippersnapper. I say that up front because maybe school isn’t what it used to be. I mean, if I’d turned in any paper whatsoever – even in a math class – with grammar problems like those in the crazy sign I saw, my grades would have suffered. That simply wasn’t allowed. Believe it or not, I was made to learn. (Age has also led me to forget quite a bit, but that’s a post for another day.) There was no free pass on spelling or grammar. That’s just the way it was. And for that I am mighty grateful.

 

So to the person who wrote the small sign shown in the photo above, I say thank you. Thank you for understanding the difference between its and it’s. Thank you for correct usage. Even if you just got lucky and happened to get it right that one time – thank you. Thank you. Thank you. I’ll take intelligence where I can get it.