Though I’ve been sending monthly posts to my mailing list members for years, this daily blogging thing is new territory. Not only do I have to be disciplined, I have to try and make sure these posts meet my standards. (That bar may not be too high off the ground, but it is at least raised.) And I can be my greatest critic, friends.
The technical aspects of building a website are a factor as well. And I have a hard time asking for help. It has been ever thus. My closest friends know that I sometimes keep worries and stress buried deep inside until I’m on the verge of cracking. I’m trying to be better about leaning on those who love me, but it just doesn’t come naturally. Being there for them? In a heartbeat. And those times feel as natural to me as breathing. I don’t know why there’s such a difference, but there is. Still, my loved ones are helping me evolve.
And that’s what I’d like to share with you today: my beautiful friends. I’ve gotten calls, emails and hugs. Some are posting the song download link on their social media pages, which I truly appreciate. Some are letting me know they’re listening to my CD and dissecting their favorite songs. While part of me feels “whatever floats your boat, man,” a greater part of me is flippin’ grateful. And yesterday I nearly cried when I received a note from a musician I truly admire and respect. She offered support and kind words, but maybe more importantly to me, she made me feel as if I actually have something to offer. I look up to her. I’m a fan. Her sweet note helped me feel validated. Lord knows, I don’t always give that validation to myself.
I’m going to keep feeling my way here. I’m going to keep trying. I’m going to keep aiming for the beauty and art. I’m going to keep living this gift of a life. Out loud. Hallelujah.
